I used to think I could change the world

Now I just want to watch it change

As this is a more personal post, most of it will be behind a paywall. Your financial contributions to support my writing are much appreciated and keeping these posts behind a wall with a closed door (of a monthly subscription!) keep this community feeling semi-intimate. And, I know that not everyone can afford to pay, and that a monthly commitment alongside all your other monthly financial commitments can feel a lot. Whether you’re able to become a paid subscriber or not, I value you being here. If you would like to read and can’t currently pay then send me a private message and I’ll send you a comp, no questions asked. You can listen on audio too - please scroll down for the full version.

I’m not even exaggerating. I genuinely, 100% thought I could make things different in the world. When I was a kid, I had a phase of saying that I’d been ‘put on this earth to help people’. I was reading a lot of supernatural books at the time and had the wonderful, egocentric conviction that every life had a purpose. I was lucky enough to be hanging out with drama kids through this phase of my life, so everyone accepted that this was a perfectly legitimate thing to both believe, and say out loud.