Discussion about this post

User's avatar
Laura's avatar

This year I am NOT doing Christmas lunch. I've suggested we go out for it so we can eat and leave, or my husband (who is not keen on my pub idea) is in charge of all the food. all of it.

This year, I've said no to all the Christmas catch up events that I don't really WANT to go to. Sometimes openly saying that i dont have capacity for that, sometimes I've made an excuse like being double booked.

This year, we have booked to go away from Dec 16-29, to our favourite place and its just our immediate family unit so we can be ourselves without having to explain it.

This year I have so much more clarity on what I love about Christmas (all the kid related fun stuff!) And have focused on that. Not much else matters.

There are some events we are doing that I would prefer not to, but I have considered why I have said yes to those and it is because of values around family. So it's easier to make the effort to get through them.

This year I have planned in advance for those days, and made sure we have set aside a day after them so we can all recover without the guilt of "resting". It's intentionally and purposeful and that makes it all feel okay and doable.

So many things Im doing differently. I did it a little bit last year too and just benefited so much. And others commented on how relaxed I was for xmas and were jealous of my ability to say no to events and expectations.

After Christmas I reflected on what were the things that worked and what still felt like it didn't work for us, took notes and adjusted our plans for this year.

It's a hard time of year, but it doesn't have to be as hard as it often is. It just takes a fair bit of work to get your head around (and others heads around!) Doing things a bit differently and also a lot of compassion and understanding for everyone's needs.

Expand full comment
Sarah Wheatley's avatar

I try to fiercely protect the period between Christmas and new year to do NOTHING we don’t want to do. It’s genuinely my favourite bit of the year, because everyone else is busy with their stuff and don’t notice that you’re hibernating at home with the TV and nice food, and maybe a jigsaw if I see a good one.

My kids are older now but even when they were young, I felt very ‘bah humbug’ for not taking them to every event going. I genuinely don’t think they missed much!

Expand full comment
4 more comments...

No posts